This gray, misty morning that is heavy both in the weather and spirit You called out to me Jesus. You spoke of how many want to get from You but do not want to know You. I feel the heaviness of Your heart Jesus as you speak like a forsaken wife. A wife whose husband marries her for the gratification he can get from her and not for the love he can give her. I am sorry Lord. I am sorry that those that call themselves by Your name, love their ‘self’ nature more than You. I feel Your grief and pain at how so many want to use You and You are only looking to be loved.
Jesus, how many years have You given man to learn how to love You? For some it is but a brief time and for others it has been centuries. Have you found the love You give coming back to You? Have You found the faith that will climb any mountain and cross any ocean just to be with You?
You, Jesus, called me away from the noise of the world today to just be with You. I sense Your pain at our fickleness. I know that we have failed many times in our walk with You. We have failed to just surrender the moment to You. All You desire and want is for us to cling to You as our vital necessity. To breathe You, to consume You, to be overwhelmed with Your beauty and Your love. How I have failed You so many times in that. I have missed the small moments when You beckoned me to look away from the crowd, the circus of life, and spend precious time together. I am sorry Jesus. But today I heard Your cry. I felt Your aloneness. You drew me away to that quiet place so we might spend some time with each other.
How many times have You told me, “the divine We, the divine Us?” How many times have You spoken to me that in this union and communion we share something beautiful is made? It is this communion that brings glory and honor to the Father. I have lost count of how many times it is. It seems to me that You want nothing more than to just be with me as an equal. To love and be loved as You share with the Father. Him in You, You in Him. I in You, You in I. Together we become One. I don’t know how You do this Jesus; I just know I want more of You today than I ever have.
Today is a quiet day. I hear the birds sing and the fall colors on the trees. A new Jewish year is almost upon us and I know that it is vitally important Lord. I know that You desire to have the people that call themselves after Your name to live as You did. This year will they pass under the rod on Rosh Hashanah and be found wanting Jesus? Will You find the repentance of ‘self’ that You desire? I wish I knew but I am not God. You are the only perfect and wise Judge. I pray that Your heart for Your people will draw them to Yourself. I pray that they will let go of that which keeps them from falling deeply in love with You. I pray that believers everywhere will come to understand that real love, Your Love, that lays down the ‘self’ life for You. How I know Your heart yearns to be loved as You have loved us.
Your Words are life to me Jesus. You have spoken to me through Your written Word and directly to my spirit today. I am stunned once again by Your love. Will Your people return Your love to You? I know that many desire to do great works to show their love. Grand and bold plans are drawn up and executed to ‘prove’ their love but I wonder if that is love. Isn’t the love you desire the simple moments when we turn away from all the noise, bustle, and demands of this world and just listen to You? How many listen to You Lord? I don’t mean hear You for many hear Your voice but do they listen? Do they take the time to hear what You are saying to them, to meditate and understand the depth of Your words and then obey? Do the people that call themselves by Your name actually listen and obey Your teachings? Do they pay heed to the still small voice You speak to them with?
I can only think that most do not even know how to still their souls long enough to hear what You have to say.
Everywhere I look around I am saddened to see believers pursuing a life of ‘self’ comfort and ease. There is no power nor authority in their words. They are weak, anemic spirits that look no different than those around them. They are like chameleons. How can those who only look to ‘get’ from You be happy? All they want is what makes them happy and not what makes You happy. Is this why You are so sober today? Is it because Your people, those who call themselves by Your name, have cut themselves off from You and can bear no fruit of love? That they only want the good things of this earth and not You, the most precious One? I hear Your heart Jesus. I feel that pain. What must happen to wake up Your people? What will happen to them that choose ‘self’ over spirit? What will become of those that have not learned to draw closer and closer to Your precious presence?
You are not looking for the spectacular and fantastic Lord, just the simple act of drawing near to You. You call to me, to all mankind, to be like a child, lowly, loving, trusting and forgiving. How You long for us to draw near and be loved. Oh that we would Lord. Oh that we would not only draw near to You in Love but to love You as You have loved us. Your sacrificial love given back to You. I can only dream of this Jesus for I see little evidence of this love today on earth. I think now I am beginning to understand why You ache Lord. I am only one man. Together, with my family, we have given up all for You. Today I want to repent of the lovelessness of all believers Lord. I pray for all who call themselves by Your name that you would forgive their failure to love You as You desire. You have done so much for us all and we are thankful. Please forgive us Jesus.
This is my answer in prayer to Your voice today Lord. I realize few will read this and fewer still will understand but that is quite alright. Today I give You my whole being. It is all I have but it is ALL Yours. I love You Jesus.
Blessings,
Homer
